So today I had a huge debate with a brother about the misconception that women who dress in mini-skirts and the like do NOT deserve, nor should expect to be treated badly or called whores... His comment 'if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen... that women who dress like that should not be surprised to be harassed. In Europe, and all western countries , there are women who are harassed for wearing the hijab. So why is it so difficult for people in both the west and the east to see that these two phenomenon are one and the same and neither should be condoned?
Thankfully, there were other brothers around to help me translate what I was trying to say for his benefit. When I say translate, I mean into 'man' language because he wasn't understanding it the way I was trying to explain it. The nicest thing about the whole debate is that everyone was polite and considerate when presenting their arguments. One is not always that blessed.
So: today's topic, should you not have already guessed, is the treatment of women, specifically in Islam.
Years ago I worked for two Muslim doctors, at seperate times and it was pure chance that they both (gynaecologists) happened to be Muslim. I was pretty ignorant about Islam at the time but they always struck me in their convictions and actions as being very gentle and morally grounded people. One of our patients taught me my first lesson in Islam. She said there were misconceptions due to misinterpretation of particular texts (sound familiar, any of you bible readers?). She cited a passage where it is said that a man is to treat his woman as he does his fields. The uneducated (read: ignorant or misogynistic), she said, take this to mean that the woman is her property to do with as he will, where as the educated (read: enlightened, respectful) man will know that if he neglects his fields, nothing will grow and he will become hungry and may starve.
***Think, and think again...***
I also learned in that time that Muslims don't all agree on everything. Where as Dr. Nr. 1 didn't believe at all in abortion, Dr. Nr. 2 would perform them up until 8 weeks on the claim that the soul didn't enter the body until 8 weeks gestation. As it happens, I had an abortion whilst working for Dr. Nr. 1 and when I told him he was completely non-judgemental. I was harder on myself. I ended up marrying the man I was with at the time, and he came and held my hand through the procedure, but to be honest, after having gone through it once I cannot imagine ever wanting to do that again. I HATED myself after that. I was upset that the so-called counselling I received was 'are you certain'? *Five minutes* is not enough to understand the gravity of such a decision. I had based my decision on the fact that I had only been with this man for three months and we weren't married and I was too young etc. Plus, we in the 'Liberal West' are raised with doctrines like 'her body, her choice'. In retrospect, there was no danger of the potential child being raised in poverty... and it wasn't a worry that my life would be inconvenienced (the charge of so many anti-abortionists when they are attacking anyone who has made that choice): I was just deathly afraid of this new and unplanned element in my life and didn't take time or consult my family about what I should do. Having the abortion is the one true regret I have in my life. Now, does this back up the claim that abortion has no place in an Islamic context? Theoretically, yes. See my statement on theory a little further on. The *social* issues in any culture first have to be addressed and then we can believe there is no 'need' for abortions.
For anyone of you who follows American politics, did you ever think it was ironic that Liberals support the right to Abortions yet oppose the death penalty, and Conservatives only care about the unborn (and to quote George Carlin 'They'll do anything for the unborn, but once you're born, you're on your own http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AvF1Q3UidWM) and want to kill anyone they think has perpetrated a heinous enough crime, neve rmind that they may have been wrongly convicted?
And, to return to the original topic, the treatment of women in Islam.
Just like any theory, it is wonderful on paper, but when implemented, the practice ranges from 'excellent' to 'despicable'. Of course, the press never focuses on the success stories. Happy people don't sell as many papers or advertising slots as the oppressed or those suffering tragedy. I suspect that it has about the same statistical 'success rate' as in other faiths, depending on the adherence to the Qur'an or not. In an ideal Muslim partnership, each partner respects and supports the other. Traditionally, in Muslim based countries, the man is the breadwinner, and responsible for the whole family... mother and sisters included. Hence the unequal division of inheritance. But like all other societies holding these 'traditional views', nothing could be further from the truth. Women in all societies have worked outside the home at one time or another and continue to do so. They have done so to make sure there was food on the table and all other necessities were fulfilled, and perhaps for a bit of luxury. For those equally divided households, why not uphold the equality of the people, both male and female?
Reminding each other of our duties and responsibilities is one way in which we can improve things within our own communities.
A small but vocal minority of Muslims are also starting to speak out against the practice of circumcision. This is something confined only to the Hadiths & Sunnah and not even all of the ones on the topic of hygiene. There are many countries who have banned female 'genital mutilation' and for good reason: the most severe versions are horrific to even think about. But something was pointed out to me, and I have been unable to forget it ever since. Not only does circumcision, male or female, not appear in the Qur'an, but there are many passages which speak out against the practice entirely. Allah says quite clearly that he has created us in the 'most perfect of forms' and we are forbidden to alter Allah's creation, even the cutting of cattle's ears is not permitted, so why do some Muslims protest against tattoos and say it's forbidden, yet have no problem in permanently altering the sexual organs of their children? If you have any theories or comments, I welcome them, but I would appreciate it if you can restrain yourself to polite and thought out correspondence.
In the meantime, as a whole, we Muslims have a long way to go in the stride for all HUMAN RIGHTS. Not just that of women or men or children. And all societies are struggling with their own daemons. I suggest that the first step to solving our problems is to stop pointing the finger at other countries and cultures and start owning the problems closest to home, and only then can we think about making the world a better place. The best way to preach is to live by example. I pray all of you have success in presenting the best way to live through your actions and words. May you be safe and fed and warm and your sleep be peaceful and your days filled with happiness.
Wasalam u alikum
The peace of the Lord be with you
vrijdag 28 oktober 2011
zondag 23 oktober 2011
On finding authentic religious guidence in an age of technology
Much of what I am about to write is applicable, in broad terms, to every religion, so I hope that it will help others to find their way in whatever school of thought they are subscribing to.
When I first started to study Islam, I was doing so as a Christian who was truly interested in obtaining knowledge of the in's and out's of the religion in which a few of my friends entrust their faith to and to know what was true and what was not in all the rumours floating around and to be able to debate, with knowledge, anyone making statements of hate and claiming that the religion itself is responsible for extremist behaviour.
I took an online course which was, alhumdulillah, excellent. I learned many things and am still in intermittent contact with my teacher.
One of the wonderful resources open to us in this age is the internet. What many people fail to recognize is that the internet is not an infallible resource for knowledge. Even intelligent and well educated people seem to be susceptible to the condition of non-critical thinking. Cases in point: those dumb chain letters that go around and YouTube.
YouTube is full of hundreds of thousands, if not millions of videos by all sorts of yeehaws (I don't mean just southern rednecks, but all of the uneducated masses telling other people how to live their lives). These people are focusing on the minutae and bickering and trying to prove the other party wrong. This is not labour worthy of anyone calling themselves a true believer. But that is just my opinon, and Allah knows best.
There is one particular clip, in which some so-called Muslim man is 'debating' a priest and tries to make it look as if the priest is not knowledgeable of the bible.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOGLu5nfCNc
When one references the verse, Jesus did, in fact, technically, say that, but actually in the context of a parable: in which the original speaker was a king, in the parable of the 10 Minas!
This misquoting of holy texts to try and make oneself look good, victorious etc. is patently not worthy behaviour of any believer and is a waste of everybody's time.
But it is, in fact, not these easily refutable yeehaws I am concerned about. No, the real threat is from those out there who speak 99% truth and then slip in something every once in a while which is not true, but in their own interests of promoting their own vision of how things should be.
Point in case: Dr. Zakir Naik. Someone I knew suggested I watch his videos because he is so knowlegable, yada yada yada. I watched some videos and however it seemed he had memorized much, if not all of the Qur'an and was apparently knowledgeable yet he was speaking in such a way that made the hair stand up on the back of my neck. There was something wrong, but I couldn't pinpoint what it was.
Determined to have some argument to take back to the one who referred me, I watched many videos until I came to his lecture: Islam and women - modernizing or outdated? It was in his question and answer period where his own words betrayed him. In answering separate questions, he stated that women should not be leading prayer because it would be disturbing and distracting to the men and he stated that women could not be good leaders because it had been "medically proven" that women become disturbed during their menstrual cycles and are not mentally fit to lead.
!
Now, let us use our powers of reason for a moment here: by his own reasoning, any man seeing a woman is somehow disturbed whereas he claims that women are not capable of reason during their menstural cycle. Therefore it stands to reason that all men must be disturbed in the presence of a woman (theoretically every day) where as a woman would only be having problems for 5 days a month (oh, that theory is completely false, by the way... and unfortunately is perpetuated by a couple of women wishing to reduce their sentences for killing or harming someone by claiming they were menstruating at the time of the crime and therefore not accountable for their actions). You should also know some real scholars (the Dr. in Zakir Naik's title is due to the fact that he is a family physician: not an Islamic scholar) have issued fatwas against Zakir Naik. I highly recommend you read up on their reasons.
The Qur'an reminds the reader to exercise critical thinking. There are many reminders regarding the perils and pitfalls of following convention and cultural habits rather than correct and moral action.
Why are so many Muslims apparently 'automated' in their worship?
These sorts mentioned above are dangerous men (and I say men, because the disproportionate number of vocal people in Islam are and always have been men. (Just as in Christianity and Judaism) Why is it that whilst Aisha was considered a scholar in her time, and many men came to her for advice and she even led the prayer, and women have been for long excluded from the realm of scholarship and leadership with few exceptions? Why is it that there are no women who sing the call to prayer? There are no women singing in Islamic versions of 'eurosong' etc? This exclusion to the point of segregation makes no sense and has no basis in the Qur'an.
Even in the Mosques, technology has allowed many men to justify the complete shutting off of the women from the men. Instead of following the imam directly, the women can watch on a screen or hear what he is doing through the use of a microphone. Would it not just be simpler to implement the system used in the time of the prophet Mohammed (pbuh)?
There are thoughtful scholars out there, one just has to exercise a bit of sense in order to weed out the rif-raf from the real scholars. I can tell you who I listen to, but certainly do not listen to someone else's decisions on who to listen to and who to dismiss. God gave you a brain, so please use it!!!
When I first started to study Islam, I was doing so as a Christian who was truly interested in obtaining knowledge of the in's and out's of the religion in which a few of my friends entrust their faith to and to know what was true and what was not in all the rumours floating around and to be able to debate, with knowledge, anyone making statements of hate and claiming that the religion itself is responsible for extremist behaviour.
I took an online course which was, alhumdulillah, excellent. I learned many things and am still in intermittent contact with my teacher.
One of the wonderful resources open to us in this age is the internet. What many people fail to recognize is that the internet is not an infallible resource for knowledge. Even intelligent and well educated people seem to be susceptible to the condition of non-critical thinking. Cases in point: those dumb chain letters that go around and YouTube.
YouTube is full of hundreds of thousands, if not millions of videos by all sorts of yeehaws (I don't mean just southern rednecks, but all of the uneducated masses telling other people how to live their lives). These people are focusing on the minutae and bickering and trying to prove the other party wrong. This is not labour worthy of anyone calling themselves a true believer. But that is just my opinon, and Allah knows best.
There is one particular clip, in which some so-called Muslim man is 'debating' a priest and tries to make it look as if the priest is not knowledgeable of the bible.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOGLu5nfCNc
When one references the verse, Jesus did, in fact, technically, say that, but actually in the context of a parable: in which the original speaker was a king, in the parable of the 10 Minas!
This misquoting of holy texts to try and make oneself look good, victorious etc. is patently not worthy behaviour of any believer and is a waste of everybody's time.
But it is, in fact, not these easily refutable yeehaws I am concerned about. No, the real threat is from those out there who speak 99% truth and then slip in something every once in a while which is not true, but in their own interests of promoting their own vision of how things should be.
Point in case: Dr. Zakir Naik. Someone I knew suggested I watch his videos because he is so knowlegable, yada yada yada. I watched some videos and however it seemed he had memorized much, if not all of the Qur'an and was apparently knowledgeable yet he was speaking in such a way that made the hair stand up on the back of my neck. There was something wrong, but I couldn't pinpoint what it was.
Determined to have some argument to take back to the one who referred me, I watched many videos until I came to his lecture: Islam and women - modernizing or outdated? It was in his question and answer period where his own words betrayed him. In answering separate questions, he stated that women should not be leading prayer because it would be disturbing and distracting to the men and he stated that women could not be good leaders because it had been "medically proven" that women become disturbed during their menstrual cycles and are not mentally fit to lead.
!
Now, let us use our powers of reason for a moment here: by his own reasoning, any man seeing a woman is somehow disturbed whereas he claims that women are not capable of reason during their menstural cycle. Therefore it stands to reason that all men must be disturbed in the presence of a woman (theoretically every day) where as a woman would only be having problems for 5 days a month (oh, that theory is completely false, by the way... and unfortunately is perpetuated by a couple of women wishing to reduce their sentences for killing or harming someone by claiming they were menstruating at the time of the crime and therefore not accountable for their actions). You should also know some real scholars (the Dr. in Zakir Naik's title is due to the fact that he is a family physician: not an Islamic scholar) have issued fatwas against Zakir Naik. I highly recommend you read up on their reasons.
The Qur'an reminds the reader to exercise critical thinking. There are many reminders regarding the perils and pitfalls of following convention and cultural habits rather than correct and moral action.
Why are so many Muslims apparently 'automated' in their worship?
These sorts mentioned above are dangerous men (and I say men, because the disproportionate number of vocal people in Islam are and always have been men. (Just as in Christianity and Judaism) Why is it that whilst Aisha was considered a scholar in her time, and many men came to her for advice and she even led the prayer, and women have been for long excluded from the realm of scholarship and leadership with few exceptions? Why is it that there are no women who sing the call to prayer? There are no women singing in Islamic versions of 'eurosong' etc? This exclusion to the point of segregation makes no sense and has no basis in the Qur'an.
Even in the Mosques, technology has allowed many men to justify the complete shutting off of the women from the men. Instead of following the imam directly, the women can watch on a screen or hear what he is doing through the use of a microphone. Would it not just be simpler to implement the system used in the time of the prophet Mohammed (pbuh)?
There are thoughtful scholars out there, one just has to exercise a bit of sense in order to weed out the rif-raf from the real scholars. I can tell you who I listen to, but certainly do not listen to someone else's decisions on who to listen to and who to dismiss. God gave you a brain, so please use it!!!
zondag 16 oktober 2011
Asalamualikum: mission statement and ground rules
Salam U Alikum Brothers and Sisters,
I created this blog a week ago, however this is my first post as I have been trying to formulate exactly what I wish to express here, therefore, please look upon this as a kind of a 'mission statement'.
I came into the Faith of Islam recently, and being a Western woman from a Christian background, I have been asked by numerous people why and how this happened. In addition, I am still discovering many things about my faith and how people from different cultures approach it, from the minutiae to the big issues. I'm doing my best to weed out what things are truly attached to Islam and what are the behaviours and habits borne out of traditions, cultural influence etc.
I intend this blog to be a kind of a window into my journey of discovery: What my thought processes are, what large and small issues I have and will tackle, what my experiences are both within and without the Muslim sphere and how I approach life the relationships in my life on the basis of my faith. Inshallah, It is my hope that this journey will be useful for the following groups:
1) Other new Muslims or those considering conversion who will find some comfort in finding that in their own questions/struggles etc. they are not alone... there are many common difficulties we will share!
2) 'Born' Muslims: Those who have always known the faith and lived within it: I pray this will give you a window to the unique issues New Muslims face: outside of the obvious social issues with family/friends, an example I can give you is the subtle frustration of having to break fast during Ramadan alone because you have no family to do so with...
3) Westerners who have no experience (friends) with Islam and whose views on the faith may perhaps be skewed due to the media/friends/family having negative opinions about the faith... perhaps you will find some truth in my musings to give you another perspective
I endeavour to make this a mixture of blogging on certain topics or on experiences from a particular day.
I encourage you to ask questions, but will ignore any hate or fanboi or taunting messages. Please be considerate in your questions: take the time to phrase them accurately. If the subject you ask me about is one on which I believe I have insufficient knowledge, I will forward you to someone with better authority on that particular matter.
Any feedback that is disrespectful, hateful etc. will be deleted. My blog, my rules. You 'freedom of speech' doesn't extend to my personal internet space. If you want to go be an Idiot, go find a street-corner. :-D
And please, my brothers and sisters, I ask you to please correct me if I have made an incorrect reference, or can improve the reference by some quote or link that will help elucidate the point I am trying to make.
May Allah, our God, be with you and give you peace in your heart and happiness in your life.
God Bless,
Wasalam U Alikum.
I created this blog a week ago, however this is my first post as I have been trying to formulate exactly what I wish to express here, therefore, please look upon this as a kind of a 'mission statement'.
I came into the Faith of Islam recently, and being a Western woman from a Christian background, I have been asked by numerous people why and how this happened. In addition, I am still discovering many things about my faith and how people from different cultures approach it, from the minutiae to the big issues. I'm doing my best to weed out what things are truly attached to Islam and what are the behaviours and habits borne out of traditions, cultural influence etc.
I intend this blog to be a kind of a window into my journey of discovery: What my thought processes are, what large and small issues I have and will tackle, what my experiences are both within and without the Muslim sphere and how I approach life the relationships in my life on the basis of my faith. Inshallah, It is my hope that this journey will be useful for the following groups:
1) Other new Muslims or those considering conversion who will find some comfort in finding that in their own questions/struggles etc. they are not alone... there are many common difficulties we will share!
2) 'Born' Muslims: Those who have always known the faith and lived within it: I pray this will give you a window to the unique issues New Muslims face: outside of the obvious social issues with family/friends, an example I can give you is the subtle frustration of having to break fast during Ramadan alone because you have no family to do so with...
3) Westerners who have no experience (friends) with Islam and whose views on the faith may perhaps be skewed due to the media/friends/family having negative opinions about the faith... perhaps you will find some truth in my musings to give you another perspective
I endeavour to make this a mixture of blogging on certain topics or on experiences from a particular day.
I encourage you to ask questions, but will ignore any hate or fanboi or taunting messages. Please be considerate in your questions: take the time to phrase them accurately. If the subject you ask me about is one on which I believe I have insufficient knowledge, I will forward you to someone with better authority on that particular matter.
Any feedback that is disrespectful, hateful etc. will be deleted. My blog, my rules. You 'freedom of speech' doesn't extend to my personal internet space. If you want to go be an Idiot, go find a street-corner. :-D
And please, my brothers and sisters, I ask you to please correct me if I have made an incorrect reference, or can improve the reference by some quote or link that will help elucidate the point I am trying to make.
May Allah, our God, be with you and give you peace in your heart and happiness in your life.
God Bless,
Wasalam U Alikum.
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